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Jun 16

Good morning, Father.
Thank you for the warmth and encouragement in my heart this morning. Thank you for letting my daughter stay here today, instead of either going to her friend’s for a week (as originally planned) or going to work with my husband (as is normal). It really seems like I need her more than he does, today. Yesterday, the pain was raw, unhindered, flowing. Today it seems like the wound of grief is getting to that dry, sticky stage of healing where it actually hurts MORE. There’s like a despair or desperation, almost a bargaining or anger flitting around the sorrow, making it seem more dangerous, less manageable. I’ve started to fear doing things, too — like taking a shower or mowing the lawn. It’s like I fear washing or mowing away all traces of my faithful little companion of 12 years. I miss my Tiny Friend!! 😥

Revelations 21:1-8 ERV

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth. The first heaven and the first earth had disappeared. Now there was no sea.
And I saw the holy city, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God. It was prepared like a bride dressed for her husband.
I heard a loud voice from the throne. It said, “Now God’s home is with people. He will live with them. They will be his people. God himself will be with them and will be their God.
He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death, sadness, crying, or pain. All the old ways are gone.”
The one who was sitting on the throne said, “Look, I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this, because these words are true and can be trusted.”
The one on the throne said to me, “It is finished! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. I will give free water from the spring of the water of life to anyone who is thirsty.
All those who win the victory will receive all this. And I will be their God, and they will be my children.
But those who are cowards, those who refuse to believe, those who do terrible things, those who kill, those who sin sexually, those who do evil magic, those who worship idols, and those who tell lies–they will all have a place in the lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.”

I thank you, Lord, for giving me HOPE. For not only will you welcome us into a time when there are no more tears — ever — but also, on a smaller scale, I know you will lead me into a time when THESE tears are more bearable, and my heart is less broken and raw. Jesus, you are my healer. You are the one who will set me free from the great heavy weight of this sorrow. In your presence, I can both feel the loss, and yet be strong enough to create something new, something good, for you. Even for my little Rusty, if I may be allowed to include his heart. Father, continue your work in me. Thank you so much for the love and the lessons I received for 12 years from my Tiny Friend. Help me to move forward, with you, without guilt or remorse. I give my broken heart to you, Lord.


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