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Jun 15

Hello, Father.
My heart is hurting, I really, really miss my Tiny Friend, my constant companion for the last 12+ years. I have been doing so well, and I thank you for so awesomely removing all guilt and uncertainty from my grief load. I cannot imagine how much worse it would be, if I were carrying that. But, Lord, I came back from my morning walk, and there was no tiny body falling all over himself, so happy to see me. I took off my boots without a struggle — without tiny mouth and paws taking advantage of my hands being so close to the floor, trying to play with me while I untie my boots and take off my socks. I miss him, Lord. Please hold my heart and help me heal! 😥

Psalm 23 ERV

A song of David. The LORD is my shepherd. I will always have everything I need.
He gives me green pastures to lie in. He leads me by calm pools of water.
He restores my strength. He leads me on right paths to show that he is good.
Even if I walk through a valley as dark as the grave, I will not be afraid of any danger, because you are with me. Your rod and staff comfort me.
You prepared a meal for me in front of my enemies. You welcomed me as an honored guest. My cup is full and spilling over.
Your goodness and mercy will be with me all my life, and I will live in the LORD’S house a long, long time.

Thank you for being my Shepherd, Jesus. Thank you for giving me the most awesome gift of my tiny Rusty, my faithful companion for the last dozen years of my life. Thank you for making his passing so peaceful, so full of love and comfort. Thank you for letting the vet and the techs be so supportive and patient and understanding and kind. Thank you for letting my husband and my daughter be there, and having contact with each of my sons afterwards. Thank you, above all else for my two greatest gifts of the last 24 hours: First, the peaceful assurance that Rusty’s passing was RIGHT and GOOD. So I do not wonder, “Did I do the right thing?” So I do not blame myself, or wonder if I had taken it into my own hands. Second, the beautiful feeling that Rusty is actually closer to me NOW, since the only place he really exists any more is INSIDE me. I don’t have to go find him, look at him, touch him. I only need look inside, to see his beautiful loyal heart there, still entwined with my own. Thank you for ALL your awesome mercies, Lord!


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