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Fran Lafferty

Fran Lafferty

I shall yet learn, and grow beyond the immaturity of adulthood. I shall again laugh, and learn the wisdom of a child.

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Feb 2

Good morning, Father.
Weirdness. I am constantly oscillating between awesome contentment and scratchy irritation. I feel joyous… with an undertone of angst. Peace and frustration seem to be occupying the same space. What a strange morning! Oh, well. As always, I just give it all to you, faithful Shepherd. Thank you for all the progress and peacefulness yesterday, with a completely new setup in our camper — storage shelves and kitchen-only space! and two new videos created, with one released and partially promo’ed. I do enjoy video production, and part of my contentment is the fact that I have more to do to finish the second vid… and then I have interesting OTHER projects waiting… including some art stuff… and even updating old Spanish products and such.

 
Psalm 131 (the whole thing!) ERV

A song of David for going up to the Temple. LORD, I don’t feel proud. I don’t see myself as better than others. I am not thinking about doing great things or reaching impossible goals. 
No, right now I am calm and quiet, like a child after nursing, content in its mother’s arms. 

Israel, trust in the LORD. Trust in him now and forever! 

 
Lord, I do not feel proud, either. I feel humbled by all the things I COULD do, but I don’t think any of them are very great. I have more goals than hairs on my head, but most of them just fall out and get replaced by new growth. I want to make more income, yet I feel like I have ALMOST everything I need already… and I fear that having too much more will take away some of my simple joy. My Mate and I both very much enjoy our frugal life. To be honest, I AM used to having a little more than what I have right now… at least having a few new backup pairs of decent “Daily” wear contact lenses… at least the ability to go to the grocery store or laundromat… at least the ability to purchase an instructional eBook or plugins that I need to build my websites or do something new with my creative apps. I feel almost straightjacketed, limited by only having basically $7 to my name, having given every other dollar I’ve made to my Mate to save up for insurance and registration on our vehicle. It feels stifling. Irritating. Help me to just let all my little frustrations GO, Lord. Give me wisdom and humility and the willingness to accept your provision. It is ENOUGH. Thank you for satisfying ALL my NEEDS, faithful Shepherd. I know you will comfort my heart and give my mind plenty of distractions and satisfactions. Amen.

Thank you, Father, for the amazing gully in my backyard, heehee… and all the amazing variety of cats that live here, too. Thank you for allowing me to be in the right place at the right time, to get footage of the cats in the gully, and thank you for the ever-developing skillset you are building in me, learning how to produce videos and create such a wide array of visuals. 😀

 

 

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