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Jul 24

Good morning, Lord.
Thank you for your enduring mercy and care, my Lord! Thank you for helping me through yesterday, when the tears started up again, missing my Tiny Friend. I’m not sure how much the hormone crazies are getting me, or if it is just normal to start crying again, after a couple weeks without. Still, I DID print out pics of the little guy, to finally catch up my notebook journal, which I have been ignoring since he died. So it’s not like the tears came out of nowhere, I just expected that I could face his death and write matter-of-factly, without crying anymore. I thought I’d grown past that. But then again, I did cry off and on for months, maybe even more than a year, when I was just REMEMBERING Tommy‘s death. I am glad that my Tiny Friend didn’t suffer, and I AM glad a lot of times lately, that he is no longer here and suffering, or being frightened by loud noises and commotion. Thank you again, Father, for your mercy, in providing such a loving, peaceful passing for my Tiny Friend! 😀

Psalm 30 ERV

A song of David for the dedication of the Temple. LORD, you lifted me out of my troubles. You did not give my enemies a reason to laugh, so I will praise you.
LORD my God, I prayed to you, and you healed me.
LORD, you lifted me out of the grave. I was falling into the place of death, but you saved my life.
Praise the LORD, you who are loyal to him! Praise his holy name!
His anger lasts for a little while, but then his kindness brings life. The night may be filled with tears, but in the morning we can sing for joy!
When I was safe and secure, I thought nothing could hurt me.
Yes, LORD, while you were kind to me, I felt that nothing could defeat me. But when you turned away from me, I was filled with fear.
So, LORD, I turned and prayed to you. I asked you, Lord, to show me mercy.
I said, “What good is it if I die and go down to the grave? The dead just lie in the dirt. They cannot praise you. They cannot tell anyone how faithful you are.
LORD, hear my prayer, and be kind to me. LORD, help me!”
You have changed my sorrow into dancing. You have taken away my sackcloth and clothed me with joy.
You wanted me to praise you and not be silent. LORD my God, I will praise you forever!

I thank you, Lord, that you ALWAYS give me something to praise you for, something to be grateful for, something to bring me joy. Even when I was four years old, horribly abused, no one to show me love or kindness, YOU were still there, Lord. Even then, you gave me so much joy that I sang to you, to “The One Who Owns All This” — for that is how I saw you, in my child-mind. You would send me a tiny bug or the ability to notice a tiny detail of some plant, and I would just sing to you about such wonders. You were my friend then, and you have been ever since, and I cannot imagine life without your touch, your care, every day. Thank you for loving me, Lord! 😀


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