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May 26

Lord, it is hot, almost 100 degrees. I thought we would be out of Texas weeks ago. Help me to not get too irritable, and to just stay light and supportive and sensitive to all my husband’s needs, and less sensitive to my own. Thank you for helping me get a full night of sleep, despite the heat and lack of breeze. To be honest, not having electricity is turning out to be less painful than anticipated. I do still feel quite lost without internet, though, trying desperately to conserve mobile data even while yet more people waste my time and resources “window shopping”, asking questions about the things we have posted for sale, even saying they are on their way over… then never showing up. I am so discouraged and SICK of people wasting my time and resources that I truly feel like I could cry for three days straight. I feel burned out, used up, wounded and desperate for a show of kindness and some positivity. I truly wish you would just move the heart of even one of your people to find this blog or one of my other sites, and send me an encouraging word or maybe even donate enough money to relieve this pressure on me to get money by selling my husband’s stuff while still maintaining my mobile data and keeping a charge on my phone. It all seems so impossible, Lord. I wish we could just leave all this stuff as a donation to our landlord, and yet somehow walk away with enough money in our pockets to survive awhile. I really don’t think I ask too much, Lord. I really feel like I have been enduring like a trooper. How is it that I find myself so suddenly with tears streaming down my face, emotionally exhausted, surprised at how weak I feel?

 
James 4:8-17 ERV

Come near to God and he will come near to you. You are sinners, so clean sin out of your lives. You are trying to follow God and the world at the same time. Make your thinking pure. Be sad, be sorry, and cry! Change your laughter into crying. Change your joy into sadness. Be humble before the Lord, and he will make you great. Brothers and sisters, don’t say anything against each other. If you criticize your brother or sister in Christ or judge them, you are criticizing and judging the law they follow. And when you are judging the law, you are not a follower of the law. You have become a judge. God is the one who gave us the law, and he is the Judge. He is the only one who can save and destroy. So it is not right for you to judge anyone. Some of you say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to some city. We will stay there a year, do business, and make money.” Listen, think about this: You don’t know what will happen tomorrow. Your life is like a fog. You can see it for a short time, but then it goes away. So you should say, “If the Lord wants, we will live and do this or that.” But now you are proud and boast about yourself. All such boasting is wrong. If you fail to do what you know is right, you are sinning.

 
Lord, help me to just draw near to you, and trust you to take care of all things, in your perfect way, in your perfect timing. Help me to grow strong again by thanking you for every tiny thing in my life that does not suck, from my soaking wet shirt that’s keeping me cooler, to the protein bread that’s giving my body energy. I look forward to learning more about you and your Creation and your people. Amen.

 

May 25

Good morning, Father.
Thank you for taking such awesome care of me, gently guiding me how to get thoroughly clean and refreshed this morning despite having no electricity or hot water. I feel great! Thank you for the peace I have this morning, not worried about anything, able to focus on the present moment instead of fretting about things that might or might not happen in the future, and how I will deal with them – as if I had to figure it all out myself, lol. Please help me to remain calm and patient, waiting on you and staying ready to learn and to do your will. Show me what I need to do this day, outside of all the time spent helping my husband. Thank you, Shepherd. Lead on!

 
Titus 3:3-7 ERV

In the past we were foolish too. We did not obey, we were wrong, and we were slaves to the many things our bodies wanted and enjoyed. We lived doing evil and being jealous. People hated us and we hated each other. But then the kindness and love of God our Savior was made known. He saved us because of his mercy, not because of any good things we did. He saved us through the washing that made us new people. He saved us by making us new through the Holy Spirit. God poured out to us that Holy Spirit fully through Jesus Christ our Savior. We were made right with God by his grace. God saved us so that we could be his children and look forward to receiving life that never ends.

 
Hurray! This was so much easier today, posting on my phone, that I am much encouraged! I am feeling a little lost, how to help my husband right now, or whether to just stay out of his way and be supportive from a distance, let him come to me when ready, but the peace I have is allowing me to just be flexible and ready to adapt to the change of circumstances and needs. Thank you, Lord, for this day and its opportunities to serve you. 🙂

 

May 24

Hello, Lord!
Thank you for teaching me how to more efficiently post to this blog, using as little mobile data as possible. There are still sooooooo many details about life without electricity that I need to learn in the coming days and weeks. Please help me to discern what are actually legitimate, immediate needs, and which can wait, and which to let go of altogether. For example, how often do I really need to wash clothes? What are all my options for bathing? How can I best maintain my health and energy? How do I sleep without a fan, when it is HOT? What makes my head hurt, or feel fuzzy? I look forward to learning more each day with you, faithful Shepherd! Please guide me to follow you faithfully. 🙂

 
Colossians 2:6‭-‬10 ERV

You accepted Christ Jesus as Lord, so continue to live following him. You must depend on Christ only, drawing life and strength from him. Just as you were taught the truth, continue to grow stronger in your understanding of it. And never stop giving thanks to God. Be sure you are not led away by the teaching of those who have nothing worth saying and only plan to deceive you. That teaching is not from Christ. It is only human tradition and comes from the powers that influence this world. I say this because all of God lives in Christ fully, even in his life on earth. And because you belong to Christ you are complete, having everything you need. Christ is ruler over every other power and authority.

 
Lord, I thank you for already giving me everything I need through Jesus. I thank you for choosing me and giving me a chance to serve you. Please make me wise and help me to stay humble and teachable. Show me how to order my days and be fruitful for you. Amen.

 

May 23

Hello, Father!
Thank you for this extremely busy day, not even having a chance to write until I am fixing to go to sleep for the night! Please teach me how to be more efficient at using my phone to write, and being super frugal with my tiny bit of mobile data, now that I have no internet. Please help me find time tomorrow to learn how to more easily copy and paste scripture using my phone as well. Amen and good night, Father. 😀

May 22

Hello, Lord!
Thank you so, so, so much for the awesome loving family that has helped us out these past couple days, and thank you for causing the repairs to Mr. D. to be finished early enough that I could still take a hot shower and cook one last meal before our electricity is turned off for good (even though I am now out of clean laundry, having sold the washer and dryer already, lol). Lord, there are so many things to look forward to, and I thank you for making myself and my husband FREE to explore your world and your people without being hindered by an expensive home and car and clothing and all the other things that demand constant time and money. Please help us to sell the last of our things and please guide us to a friendly place where we can rest and build our camper — somewhere that allows us time to think and plan and build carefully rather than hurriedly or under super pressure. Thank you for always providing, Lord. I am so joyous to be given a chance to serve you!

 
Psalm 71:1-8 ERV

LORD, I depend on you for protection. Don’t let me be disappointed. 
You always do what is right, so come and save me. Listen to me and save me. 
Be my Rock, my place of safety. Be my fortress, and protect me! You are my Rock and my protection. 
My God, save me from wicked people. Save me from cruel, evil people. 
Lord GOD, you are my hope. I have trusted you since I was a young boy. 
I depended on you even before I was born. I relied on you even in my mother’s womb. I have always prayed to you. 
You are my source of strength, so I have been an example to others. 
I am always singing about the wonderful things you do. 

 
Lord, I am so grateful for the way that you have made me! I am so glad that even while I waited outside a stranger’s home, with no real home of my own, I still could sing quietly to you, and thank you for your help and your provision. Thank you so much for giving me a husband who loves you and desires to serve you faithfully, and thank you for my awesome children as well. Please return blessings a thousandfold to all who have helped any of my family. Please give each of their hearts peace and joy and a sense of your awesome presence and faithful care. Thank you, Shepherd!

 

May 21

Hello, Father!
Haha, my first time posting from someone else’s home! Thank you, Lord, for awesome people who love you and delight in helping others, even total strangers. Thank you for everyone who has helped us out this past week, even those who weren’t even quite aware of the help they gave. Thank you for making the clutch and flywheel replacement go relatively smoothly on Mr. D. so far, and thank you for helping me learn some new things. Lord, I am so looking forward to having new experiences of many types and varieties — although I must admit right now I am most fervently interested in automotive and other mechanical parts because that has just been triggered in me, lol, and I am soooo looking forward to eventually being able to PLAY with parts and designs and modifications and launching into all sorts of R&D projects of both the mechanical and the electrical varieties. WOOT! Thank you for reminding me, Lord, just how much there is to look forward to…! 😀

 
Psalm 16:5-11 ERV

LORD, you give me all that I need. You support me. You give me my share. 
My share is wonderful. My inheritance is very beautiful. 
I praise the LORD because he taught me well. Even at night he put his instructions deep inside my mind. 
I always remember that the LORD is with me. He is here, close by my side, so nothing can defeat me. 
So my heart and soul will be very happy. Even my body will live in safety, 
because you will not leave me in the place of death. You will not let your faithful one rot in the grave. 
You will teach me the right way to live. Just being with you will bring complete happiness. Being at your right side will make me happy forever. 

 
Lord, I trust you completely. I do not know what the next week will hold, where I will be each night, and if I will be stinky from lack of shower, or hungry, or crabby from lack of sleep. And yet, I do know that each day brings us closer to freedom, to having the camper built on the back of Mr. D, and from finally leaving the great (hot and dry) state of Texas, lol. I have so much to look forward to, so many people to meet and encourage and share your awesome Love with, that all the trivial little comforts and conveniences seem a small thing to trade. I delight in your will for me, even as I know that at times it will be quite difficult. Please keep me humble and teachable, awesome Shepherd. Help me to be an awesome helpmeet to my husband, patient and supportive and not toooooo challenging, heehee. Teach us to delight more and more in your creation and your people and even the mechanics and dynamics of your Creation. Thank you for helping us grow into little children exploring our Father’s Creation. Lead on!

 

May 20

Hello, Lord.
Thank you for sustaining me through these difficult days, while we sit helpless, waiting for Sunday and the hopeful promise of our vehicle (our home!) to be repaired. Please help me to hold together, not to break down or take my frustrations out on others. Help me to be patient and kind and keep sharing your Love with those around me, even while I sincerely feel the need for a little comfort and kindness myself. Thank you for always being ENOUGH for me, Lord. Thank you for your Word that comforts and encourages me, and thank you for The Great Courses, and my various Kindle books, which distract me and give me the kind of hope that comes through learning.

 
Philippians 4:12-13 ERV

I know how to live when I am poor and when I have plenty. I have learned the secret of how to live through any kind of situation—when I have enough to eat or when I am hungry, when I have everything I need or when I have nothing. 
Christ is the one who gives me the strength I need to do whatever I must do.

 
Thank you for giving me strength, Oh Lord. Thank you for choosing me. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to serve you, and to learn of you. Please comfort and encourage all those whom I love. Amen.

 

May 19

Lord, please help me remember that if I go too long without MUSIC, I go a little crazy!! Thank you for helping me find my way BACK — to freedom, to courage, to JOY. Thank you for the awesomeness of Bad Company and Lynyrd Skynyrd and Led Zeppelin. Thank you for the 500+ OTHER songs I have scattered about on my five different music-capable devices, and thank you for my lovely sweet little speaker critter, my blue polar bear booster that helps me hear it LOUDER, hahaha. I’m just a silly hippie chick, and I thank you for making me this way, because it seems to cheer people up (including myself!). Thank you for giving me a way to lighten my husband’s spirits and give us BOTH a fun night — yay! Lord God, I delight in serving you. Lead on! 😛

 
Ephesians 5:15-21 ERV

So be very careful how you live. Live wisely, not like fools. 
I mean that you should use every opportunity you have for doing good, because these are evil times. 
So don’t be foolish with your lives, but learn what the Lord wants you to do. 
Don’t be drunk with wine, which will ruin your life, but be filled with the Spirit. 
Encourage each other with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your hearts to the Lord. 
Always give thanks to God the Father for everything in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. 
Be willing to serve each other out of respect for Christ. 

 
Lord I thank you for each person who has given to me and my husband recently, from the smallest smiles to the largest purchase. Thank you for both the expected and the unexpected. Thank you for the tiny bits of care that only you and I know about, and thank you for the more formal and public displays of giving. Lord, please return a hundredfold to each heart and each life, and please prepare me to share your Love and your Joy with anyone and everyone I meet, as I know that you will, lol. I confess that I get a bit too energetic and overbearing at times, and I ask you to soften my approach when that makes it easier to receive. I pray you make me a pleasing vessel for you, Oh Lord. Amen.

 

May 18

Good morning, Lord.
Father, I am really struggling to keep looking to you and keep shining the light of your Love out through my eyes and heart and actions, to whomever I come in contact with. It really SEEMS like not only Love is dead in this world, so rare an expression, but also that Faith is dead as well, for so many, many people cross my path with, “Bless you, bless you” — and leave without even giving one tenth of one percent of their resources to help our needs. Father, you see everything. You judge fairly and justly, and YOU are my avenger — I have no desire for revenge myself, or even to have any knowledge of the punishment of others. You see the extent to which both my husband and myself have extended ourselves and our resources to help others throughout our lives, even while we have been desperately poor, both of us having a heart after you, showing YOUR compassion, proving our faith as in James chapter 2. You see how we have returned forgiveness and even aid to those who have done us harm. Lord, again I am feeling so very alone, as the light of your Love is growing dimmer even in my husband through the difficulty of our circumstance, as yet more and more people SAY they will meet with us to buy our things, to trade our vehicles for repair of Mr. D, — and we just lose more time and resources, waiting for them to arrive, and they never do. I feel wounded by all, Lord, except by you. You see even the things that burden my heart that I cannot even write on this blog. You see how my heart is crying, not wanting to grow cold and put up a wall to protect itself against the world’s harsh treatment and lack of Love and Faith. Help me, Lord. Let one soul that loves you reach out to me personally in some small way — soon — as a testimony to your living Spirit upon this earth, within your people, to help me have more HOPE and greater motivation to keep fighting back resentment. Thank you, Father, as I know that even while I ask for it, I actually do not NEED it — for you sustain me with your Word and your presence alone. Amen.

 
James 2:1-5, 14-17 ERV

My dear brothers and sisters, you are believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ. So don’t treat some people better than others. 
Suppose someone comes into your meeting wearing very nice clothes and a gold ring. At the same time a poor person comes in wearing old, dirty clothes. 
You show special attention to the person wearing nice clothes. You say, “Sit here in this good seat.” But you say to the poor person, “Stand there!” or “Sit on the floor by our feet!” 
Doesn’t this show that you think some people are more important than others? You set yourselves up as judges—judges who make bad decisions. 
Listen, my dear brothers and sisters. God chose the poor people in the world to be rich in faith. He chose them to receive the kingdom God promised to those who love him. 
 
My brothers and sisters, if a person claims to have faith but does nothing, that faith is worth nothing. Faith like that cannot save anyone. 
Suppose a brother or sister in Christ comes to you in need of clothes or something to eat. 
And you say to them, “God be with you! I hope you stay warm and get plenty to eat,” but you don’t give them the things they need. If you don’t help them, your words are worthless. 
It is the same with faith. If it is just faith and nothing more—if it doesn’t do anything—it is dead. 

 
Lord, even while I know myself — or more like you in me — well enough to realize that even if I never ever receive one ounce of compassionate support from others, I will continue to pour it out to them — to almost every single person I ever meet. And I am grateful for that person or two each week who gives me a few words of sincere appreciation of the free printable materials I provide through my dozen-plus websites, and the few people each month who pay for the materials. I know I must look very foolish to the world, giving away what you’ve given to me, rather than hording it for myself or my family. I thank you for my son who gave much, and the two brothers (in Christ) who gave what they could. I thank you for other family and friends who have given in the past, and I thank you for the mercy of our landlord and the local authorities and neighbors. But Father, I am growing increasingly concerned that my heart may start to grow hard and less able to give your Love as abundantly, as freely and confidently as I have been to date. Please enlarge my heart and fill it with YOU — so that the well does not go dry. Thank you, compassionate Shepherd.

 
John 15:13 KJV

Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

 
Lay down = prostrate, bow, or lay aside = as in Mark 8:35 (below)

 
Dear Shepherd, only you can see what that verse means to me, how it defines my life and my purpose — my CHOICE. Thank you for teaching me a small portion of what you yourself have suffered for your people, even for those who say they love you, yet continue to hurt and betray you. Just as you desired companions with you while you suffered, I too desire someone to be there for me — an actual human who actually comforts me. Yet I know that you are ENOUGH, Lord. You always have been. Thank you. I trust you completely. Do with me as you will. Teach me more of you.

 
Mark 8:35 ERV

Any of you who try to save the life you have will lose it. But you who give up your life for me and for the Good News will save it. 

 
Lord, our home is a vehicle with a bad clutch and flywheel. Please provide for our needs. Please guide us to the right parts and the right person to help with repairs. Please help us to sell the last of our things for good prices, rather than just losing them for nothing or for peanuts. Please sustain our hearts and don’t let us grow bitter and hard like the heart of the world. Keep us soft and supple and pleasing to you. Amen.

 

May 17

Hello, God.
Thank you for helping me through all the painful moments of yesterday. Thank you for all your tender mercies and comforts throughout it all. Thank you for showing me mercy, and helping me to show mercy as well. Thank you for your Word that sustains me. Thank you for easing the pressure on my husband, despite the fact that it FEELS like the pressure on me is even greater, as a result (again). I trust you, Lord. I cannot see what is best for me or for us. Only you can know all that. Your way and your timing is so much better than mine, what I would choose for myself. Thank you for giving me a heart that loves you and loves my Mate and is willing to do your will instead of my own.

 
Matthew 26:36-46 ERV

Then Jesus went with his followers to a place called Gethsemane. He said to them, “Sit here while I go there and pray.” 
He told Peter and the two sons of Zebedee to come with him. Then he began to be very sad and troubled. 
Jesus said to Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, “My heart is so heavy with grief, I feel as if I am dying. Wait here and stay awake with me.” 
Then Jesus went on a little farther away from them. He fell to the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, don’t make me drink from this cup. But do what you want, not what I want.” 
Then he went back to his followers and found them sleeping. He said to Peter, “Could you men not stay awake with me for one hour? 
Stay awake and pray for strength against temptation. Your spirit wants to do what is right, but your body is weak.” 
Then Jesus went away a second time and prayed, “My Father, if I must do this and it is not possible for me to escape it, then I pray that what you want will be done.” 
Then he went back to the followers. Again he found them sleeping. They could not stay awake. 
So he left them and went away one more time and prayed. This third time he prayed, he said the same thing. 
Then Jesus went back to the followers and said, “Are you still sleeping and resting? The time has come for the Son of Man to be handed over to the control of sinful men. 
Stand up! We must go. Here comes the one who will hand me over.” 

 
Lord Jesus, I feel like this passage describes my sensations in all their varieties. I feel agony of soul, yet I just want to get things over with, determined to yield my will to the Father’s. I also feel weak, unable to pay attention, like your chosen brethren in the passage above. Lord, I put my little self in your big hands, and I put my husband and our truck there, too. Please protect us from those who might take advantage of our weakness and our need, including this man who is supposed to take most of our money today to fix our truck, Mr. D, so that we can move forward once again. Father, I thank you for the prayers of your people. Thank you for letting me feel their prayers and well-wishes for just a moment yesterday. That really helped. Even though I don’t know who reads this blog or visits my other sites, I thank you for every opportunity to touch someone’s heart and spread the awesome news of your enduring Love — or even just to help them with free printables, lol. Thank you for sustaining me and protecting me and comforting me, Faithful Shepherd! 😀

 

May 16

Good morning, Father.
Thank you for carrying my heart through this difficult time. Thank you for providing so many little joys and comforts along the way. Please help my heart to be strong, as the enemy tries to undermine my strength from within, once again pummeling me with SHAME and making me realize just how far away I am from being able to completely IGNORE shame, like you did, Jesus. I can feel your Spirit encouraging me to lay down shame like an old garment, just remove it from my shoulders and leave it laying on the ground. But my Lord my heart is so tangled up in that mess that I cannot even see where shame ends and begins — it just looks like a giant wounded heart to me. Please sort me out, faithful Shepherd. Help me cling to your Word and to nature and to whatever else you provide for my strength and comfort, and help me to learn how to let go of shame. Amen.

 
Hebrews 13:8-16 ERV

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever. 
Don’t let all kinds of strange teachings lead you into the wrong way. Depend only on God’s grace for spiritual strength, not on rules about foods. Obeying those rules doesn’t help anyone. 
We have a sacrifice. And those priests who serve in the Holy Tent cannot eat from the sacrifice we have. 
The high priest carries the blood of animals into the Most Holy Place and offers that blood for sins. But the bodies of those animals are burned outside the camp. 
So Jesus also suffered outside the city. He died to make his people holy with his own blood. 
So we should go to Jesus outside the camp and accept the same shame that he had. 
Here on earth we don’t have a city that lasts forever. But we are waiting for the city that we will have in the future. 
So through Jesus we should never stop offering our sacrifice to God. That sacrifice is our praise, coming from lips that speak his name. 
And don’t forget to do good and to share what you have with others, because sacrifices like these are very pleasing to God. 

 
Lord, I understand so very little of life. I am so grateful that you are my faithful Shepherd, leading me gently forward with your kind and nurturing Voice. Thank you for your patience with such an imperfect servant as myself, and thank you for your mercy and grace that makes me survive each day. Please give my husband peace and protect him from the enemy’s attacks. Help him to keep looking to you for his strength, and please guide us forward in unity upon the path you have chosen for us. Let us both be found faithful to the end. Amen.

 

May 15

Good morning, Lord.
Thank you so very much for your awesome tender and thorough care of little me! Even though I don’t even know where I will be sleeping tonight, I have peace and can rest in your arms, knowing that you will be with me and I will be comforted by your presence. I feel very joyous, and becoming more FREE all the time. I stand in awe of your mercy and grace and compassion, Lord God. Thank you for choosing me, for giving me a chance to serve you.

 
Psalm 119:1-14 ERV

Great blessings belong to those who live pure lives! They follow the LORD’S teachings. 
Great blessings belong to those who follow his rules! They seek him with all their heart. 
They don’t do wrong. They follow his ways. 
Lord, you gave us your instructions and told us to always obey them. 
How I wish I could be more faithful in obeying your laws! 
Then I would never feel ashamed when I look closely at your commands. 
The more I understand how fair your laws are, the more sincerely I will praise you. 
I will obey your laws, so please don’t leave me! 
How can a young person live a pure life? By obeying your word. 
I try with all my heart to serve you. Help me obey your commands. 
I study your teachings very carefully so that I will not sin against you. 
LORD, you are worthy of praise! Teach me your laws. 
I will repeat the laws we have heard from you. 
I enjoy following your rules as much as others enjoy great riches. 

 
Lord, again I lift my friend in New York up to you, and ask you to be with her through whatever it is she is going through right now. Help her to cling to you, and to know your faithfulness and compassion, as you have so abundantly given to me. Please help my husband cling to you as well, and please open the eyes of our understanding, give us discernment to know your will and not be distracted or deceived by those who would have us walk a different path than the one YOU would choose for us, Lord. Help us to stay attuned to your Voice, faithful Shepherd. And thank you again for the awesome peace in my whole being, resting upon You. Amen.

 

May 14

Hello, Father!
Thank you for the thousand and one little blessings you’ve given me during this time of preparation for becoming a homeless nomad! Thank you for the hundred and one blessings of this past week alone! Thank you for the dozens even since I awoke from nine hours of sleep, at 7am this morning — WOOT! I am feeling more human today, after finally getting SLEEP! And I am in total AWE of your gentle care of me, Lord. You amaze me with your careful attention to the tiny details of my needs — such a show of grace and mercy that I tremble with the power of it. THANK YOU, faithful Shepherd.

 
Ephesians 1:17-23 ERV

I always pray to the great and glorious Father, the God of our Lord Jesus Christ. I pray that he will give you the Spirit, who will let you know truths about God and help you understand them, so that you will know him better. 
I pray that God will open your minds to see his truth. Then you will know the hope that he has chosen us to have. You will know that the blessings God has promised his holy people are rich and glorious. 
And you will know that God’s power is very great for us who believe. It is the same as the mighty power 
he used to raise Christ from death and put him at his right side in the heavenly places. 
He put Christ over all rulers, authorities, powers, and kings. He gave him authority over everything that has power in this world or in the next world. 
God put everything under Christ’s power and made him head over everything for the church. 
The church is Christ’s body. It is filled with him. He makes everything complete in every way. 

 
Lord, I thank you for the awesome conversations with my sons this Mother’s Day, and I thank you for moving in each of their lives, caring for them as you care for me. I pray for my youngest son whom I worry about the most, even though in some ways he is the most stable and secure, living on an air force base with a steady income and full health insurance and such. I worry that his heart will be burdened by loneliness — for other people, for close relationships, and for the parts of himself that he has not found an outlet for yet, things that are put on hold for now. Father, please bless each of my children AND my awesome friend in New York whom I am currently MORE worried about than my own sons. Please touch her heart and let her feel your presence and your Love. Show her what a warm and caring heart you’ve given her, Lord. Give her PEACE, and help her find JOY. That is my Mother’s Day wish. Thank you, Shepherd. Lead on!

 

May 13

Oh, Lord, Lord, Lord, you are taking such awesome care of me! Even though I’ve only been getting 3 to 5 hours of sleep each night and I keep getting little moments of fear, you keep showing me over and over your gentle kindness and care, leading me faithfully what to do next, and next, and next, making sure all my Little Things are remembered and taken care of, even while I work with my husband to get things ready, get things in storage, and get things sold. Father, you see all that’s gone on. You see more than I even can remember! You have seen the literally hundreds of different messages I’ve read and sent on my phone these last few days, trying desperately to sell the rest of our things to get survival money — and we’ve only sold one or two things!!! Lord, I still trust you completely. I feel absolutely certain that you are in control, and that all our needs WILL be provided for — in your way, in your timing. Thank you for faith and peace and hope and Love, awesome Shepherd!!

 
Isaiah 56:1-8 ERV

The LORD said these things, “Be fair to all people. Do what is right, because soon my salvation will come to you. My goodness will soon be shown to the whole world. 
I will bless those who refuse to do wrong and who obey the law about the Sabbath.” 
Some foreigners will choose to follow the LORD. They should not say, “The LORD will not really accept me like the rest of his people.” A eunuch should not say, “I am only a dry piece of wood. I cannot have any children.” 
They should not say that because the LORD says, “Some eunuchs obey the laws about the Sabbath. They choose to do what I want, and they follow my agreement. 
So I will put a memorial stone in my Temple for them. Their name will be remembered in my city! Yes, I will give those eunuchs something better than sons and daughters. I will give them a name that will last forever! They will not be cut off from my people.” 
“Some foreigners have chosen to follow the LORD. They do this so that they can serve him and love his name and be his servants. They keep the Sabbath as a special day of worship, and they will continue to follow closely my agreement. 
So I will bring them to my holy mountain and make them happy in my house of prayer. The offerings and sacrifices they give me will please me, because my Temple will be called a house of prayer for all nations.” 
The Lord GOD said these things. The Israelites were forced to leave their country, but the Lord will gather them together again. He says, “I will bring them back together again!” 

 
Lord, I thank you for your Word that comforts and instructs me day and night. Please protect my husband and myself today, keep our bodies strong enough to keep moving all this heavy stuff, plus all the lifting and bending and trying to be patient with people who just waste our time and don’t buy anything. Please bring the right people at the right time, and help us be patient with each other as our nerves are fried out a bit, and please help us to keep trusting you. Increase our faith and maintain our peace. I trust you completely, my Lord.

 

May 12

Hello, Lord!
Thank you for teaching me so very much in the last day or two, especially what I’ve learned about SHAME! Your Holy Spirit is such a patient Teacher and Comforter! Thank you for showing me, first in Hebrews 12 how Jesus IGNORED shame, then in 1 Corinthians 13 how LOVE ignores shame! How awesome to be led to those two verses almost back-to-back, confirming what I need to do to overcome the shame I was tormented by. I LOVE being taught by your Word, Lord — thank you!! I’m not sure how the Easy Read Version will translate these verses, but I don’t have access to a free digital version of the Amplified on my laptop at the moment…

 
Hebrews 12:1-2 ERV

We have all these great people around us as examples. Their lives tell us what faith means. So we, too, should run the race that is before us and never quit. We should remove from our lives anything that would slow us down and the sin that so often makes us fall. 
We must never stop looking to Jesus. He is the leader of our faith, and he is the one who makes our faith complete. He suffered death on a cross. But he accepted the shame of the cross as if it were nothing because of the joy he could see waiting for him. And now he is sitting at the right side of God’s throne. 

 
1 Corinthians 13:1-8 ERV

I may speak in different languages, whether human or even of angels. But if I don’t have love, I am only a noisy bell or a ringing cymbal. 
I may have the gift of prophecy, I may understand all secrets and know everything there is to know, and I may have faith so great that I can move mountains. But even with all this, if I don’t have love, I am nothing. 
I may give away everything I have to help others, and I may even give my body as an offering to be burned. But I gain nothing by doing all this if I don’t have love. 
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, and it is not proud. 
Love is not rude, it is not selfish, and it cannot be made angry easily. Love does not remember wrongs done against it. 
Love is never happy when others do wrong, but it is always happy with the truth. 
Love never gives up on people. It never stops trusting, never loses hope, and never quits. 
Love will never end. But all those gifts will come to an end—even the gift of prophecy, the gift of speaking in different kinds of languages, and the gift of knowledge. 

 

May 11

Lord, my heart is breaking and I feel so all alone. It feels like everyone is taking, taking, taking from me, and giving nothing back. I can feel you reaching out to help me, I can hear your voice, and I can even recognize that it is just the enemy attacking me hard right now… but that voice of SHAME is so loud, it is crushing everything else out, crushing ME! Please don’t let the enemy get me, Shepherd. I don’t feel strong enough to fight for myself, will you please send help? I really just want to go home! There is not enough Love in this world, or else it’s just too far away. It doesn’t seem like it is avaliable for me to receive, just to give. Everyone is just a Hurter, a Taker. No one helps me, no one but you really cares. And thanks to the enemy’s overload of SHAME on me today, I don’t feel I even am good enough to live. The flower of your Love that you planted in me is getting choked by despair and loneliness. I am desperate to get BACK some of the tender comfort, reassurance, and encouragement that I am constantly pouring out to others. Please send me Comfort, Lord. Please encourage me, or else just take me home. I am just too alone here. Too wounded to fight any more.

May 10

Good morning, Lord!
Oh, I am so excited and so nervous at the same time! We are about to load up all my boxes of books and other things and drive over to our NEW storage space that you provided for only $35 per month. I know it may be a small thing when looking at the whole big picture, but to me this is my BIG deal…! You know my heart, Lord. You know that one of my biggest weaknesses is feeling like a burden, like I am taking up too much space, am too heavy, too loud, too… -anything that is the opposite of small and easy to endure. So asking my husband to lift the heaviest boxes that I cannot manage, praying you will not let my things hurt him, and then seeing the full extent of the space my things take up in this world… it is nearly overwhelming, Father. Please help my heart to be brave and my body to be strong. Please protect my husband and help him to be gentle and not crush me with sharp words while I am weak. Thank you, merciful Shepherd.

 
1 Peter 5:6-9 ERV

So be humble under God’s powerful hand. Then he will lift you up when the right time comes. 
Give all your worries to him, because he cares for you. 
Control yourselves and be careful! The devil is your enemy, and he goes around like a roaring lion looking for someone to attack and eat. 
Refuse to follow the devil. Stand strong in your faith. You know that your brothers and sisters all over the world are having the same sufferings that you have.

 
Lord, I tremble. Hold me tight and don’t let me fall. I am sooooooo looking forward to feeling more FREE once all my stuff is in storage. Then I am able to just leave it all behind and walk forward, being much smaller and lighter. Yay! Thank you so much, Lord, for giving me few THINGS to care for in this life, so instead I can focus on following you and sharing your Love with others. Amen!

 

May 9

Hello, Lord!
Wow, it is simply amazing how much you have increased my faith in the last few months while we have been facing homelessness! I feel closer to you than I’ve ever felt to anyone, at any time. Trusting you has become almost as easy as breathing. Running to you for comfort or encouragement has begun to be my default method of coping with life. This level of fellowship with your Spirit just blows me away, and yet I cannot keep my puny human mind from wondering, “How are you going to TEST this awesome level of faith you’ve given me, Lord? What is fixing to happen that makes me NEED this much faith?” LOL

 
1 Timothy 1:15-19 ERV

Here is a true statement that should be accepted without question: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, and I am the worst of them. 
But I was given mercy so that in me Christ Jesus could show that he has patience without limit. Christ showed his patience with me, the worst of all sinners. He wanted me to be an example for those who would believe in him and have eternal life. 
Honor and glory to the King who rules forever. He cannot be destroyed and cannot be seen. Honor and glory forever and ever to the only God. Amen. 
Timothy, you are like a son to me. What I am telling you to do agrees with the prophecies that were told about you in the past. I want you to remember those prophecies and fight the good fight of faith. 
Continue to trust in God and do what you know is right. Some people have not done this, and their faith is now in ruins. 

 
Lord, I thank you for already putting that faith to the test, lol. The person who was supposed to buy my car for $900 cash today decided not to… so now we have less than a week to get out of here, with a couple hundred dollars to our name and hundreds of dollars worth of repairs needed on the truck alone… and nowhere definite yet for my daughter to go. She can come with us but that would be so much harder, Lord — and she really does not WANT to. But yet, I can look at that and know that we would never abandon her, so how can I think for even a second that you would ever abandon us?! I still trust you completely, Shepherd. I look forward to writing about your miraculous provision for us in the coming days and weeks. Amen.

 

May 8

Good morning, Father!
Thank you for getting me up and going so early this morning, rescuing me from the fear that threatened to blind me and drawing me back to your Word for comfort and a refreshing of your Spirit of grace and mercy, a fresh dose of your peaceful assurance! 😀

 
Hebrews 10:22-25 ERV

Sprinkled with the blood of Christ, our hearts have been made free from a guilty conscience, and our bodies have been washed with pure water. So come near to God with a sincere heart, full of confidence because of our faith in Christ. 
We must hold on to the hope we have, never hesitating to tell people about it. We can trust God to do what he promised. 
We should think about each other to see how we can encourage each other to show love and do good works. 
We must not quit meeting together, as some are doing. No, we need to keep on encouraging each other. This becomes more and more important as you see the Day getting closer. 

 
Lord, I thank you for giving me hope and confidence. Please help our hearts to not grow heavy with fear and doubt, but to maintain a steady, sustaining faith in you. Please bring people here to buy the last of our things, to give us enough money to make repairs to the truck and rent a storage space and get everything ready to finally LEAVE this place at last. Father, please provide for all our needs so that we can instead focus our attention on helping others. Bring us forth out of this place of stagnancy and seeming defeat, into glorious freedom where we can meet new people and share your Love with them in whatever ways they need and can receive. Amen!

 

May 7

Hello, Lord!
Thank you for the awesome day yesterday, even though I did get rather stressed at the sluggish internet connection I had, which may have helped me detach even more from this place, LOL. I will be very grateful to not have to pay for such unreliable internet service as we have here, but rather to use free WiFi at libraries and such, after we leave. Thank you for always giving me things to be grateful for, Lord! I also thank you for giving us two wonderful tastes of what is coming for us, working together as a team to help a near stranger get something (digital) that they really desire, and then putting our heads together, having fun with electrical engineering (MPPT and SPWM technologies). Thank you for giving me a quick mind that just somehow understands so many different concepts and is so unlimited by indoctrination and other types of “stay inside the box” thinking. It is FUN to think outside the box — thank you, Father!!

 
Isaiah 55:1-9 ERV

“All you people who are thirsty, come! Here is water for you to drink. Don’t worry if you have no money. Come, eat and drink until you are full! You don’t need money. The milk and wine are free. 
Why waste your money on something that is not real food? Why should you work for something that does not really satisfy you? Listen closely to me and you will eat what is good. You will enjoy the food that satisfies your soul. 
Listen closely to what I say. Listen to me so that you will live. I will make an agreement with you that will last forever. It will be an agreement you can trust, like the one I made with David— a promise to love him and be loyal to him forever. 
I made David a witness of my power for all nations. I promised him that he would become a ruler and commander of many nations.” 
There are nations in places you don’t know, but you will call for them to come. They don’t know you, but they will run to you. This will happen because the LORD, your God, wants it. It will happen because the Holy One of Israel honors you. 
So you should look for the LORD before it is too late. You should call to him now, while he is near. 
Evil people should stop living evil lives. They should stop thinking bad thoughts. They should come to the LORD again, and he will comfort them. They should come to our God because he will freely forgive them. 
The LORD says, “My thoughts are not like yours. Your ways are not like mine. 
Just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways, and my thoughts are higher than your thoughts.” 

 
Yay! Thank you, Lord, for giving me such a peaceful assurance of your care and protection and provision! I have never felt more safe or secure or unafraid as I do now, while staring the Unknown straight in the face. It is awesome to serve you, Oh Lord! 😀 Please help me to become more pleasing to you all the time, and please give me discernment to match my faith, so that I am neither distracted nor deceived by those who only appear to be speaking or doing your will. Amen.